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kelly corrigan podcast transcript

    kelly corrigan podcast transcript

    Kelly Corrigan:Im telling you what, man, you can not believe how much I use this, and you can not believe how still it is not my natural instinct. Constance Wu also thanks a past educator of hers, Mr. Frizzle. The ambiguity is quite isolating. Ask anyone who has participated in a moment of silence. Playlist. But the fact is if I said, Tell me more, go on, what else, youd say the next thing, and the next thing, and the next thing, and it would be like the thing behind the thing, behind the thing is where really the pain is, and if I had waited way longer, I wouldve been able to say, Oh, I understand.. Kate Bowler:Wow, and thats a big word. One of the hardest things Ive been wrestling with is not having any clear language for this weird place between sick and healthy, weak and strong. Kate Bowler:Today, I get a chance to talk to Kelly about some of her very best phrases. I was wrong. For what Ive just seen in the last six months, I should be different. Kelly Corrigan:They hate it. We were living in Damascus, Syria, and whenever one of us asked for something Mom and Dad couldnt afford, Dad would say Allah Kareem. In Arabic, Allah means God. Kilpy She reflects on her love and loss through ordinary moments and everyday sayings. 5-Minute Listen. Kelly Corrigan:I was perhaps proud about it honestly, and I was reading 7 Habits of Highly Effective People at night with my big fat yellow highlighter, and I was really full of attachment to this identity that I had painted for myself. My mantra for the last decade plus has been show up and be of use. So, I kind of wondered if there was a motto youd pick for you for right now, what would it be? Hosted by four-time New York Times bestselling author Kelly Corrigan, the show dives deep into each guests life to pull out poignant lessons they hope others can use to find their own calling or better understand themselves. If you haven't heard of Father Greg Boyle, let us introduce you: a Jesuit priest who has a touch of Santa Claus in his affect, Greg Boyle has collaborated with thousands of former gang members to build thriving businesses and communities of radical acceptance in East LA. Its these seemingly trivial moments. Kelly Corrigan:Where you can feel the person kind of asking around, snooping just enough, and its not for your sake. I went to see her one time. Kilpy Like, Im just an ordinary person, and I make all the mistakes that everybody else makes and maybe even 10% more, and then there she was, and what she would have done for the life that I was kind of rushing through, multitasking my way through day, after day, and you know, sort of feeling snappish, and then catching myself, and feeling like I should be different. In other words, it could happen to you tomorrow.. In fact Im in the middle of reading both of your books right now. And the potted plant theory, I cant credit it to someone, Im sorry, I dont know who put it out there, but the idea is that if you were to have a plant in your kitchen, you might not be aware of it at all, and then if someone were to remove it, youd say What happened to that plant?. I thoroughly enjoyed your podcast and listening to you both. Thanks very much for all you do. Nobody who is between identities they can tolerate does, it seems to me something Ive actively struggled with and expect to go hand to hand with again, whether tomorrow or the day after. Now a cognitive scientist and podcaster, Maya grew up immersed in the . Kelly Corrigan:My friend Andy Lotts, who is Lizs husband, told me about it, cause hes a mom now, and so we talk mom talk. For a special listener who was just diagnosed, here are some thoughts on the stages of recovery that I encourage you to share with every last person you know who is in treatment for anything. I think people think that if you have a diagnosis, or somethings happened to you that you should know because youre proof of it. I heard your friend died, and I just couldnt bear to call them back. I was also living only maybe 10 miles from my very old grandma who lived alone, and I kept kind of meaning to go visit her, but its a lot easier to show up at work every day at the United Way, and get kind of righteous about all the people who work for money versus the rest of us who are working for the greater good, than it is to go to your grandmas smelly, weird apartment, and have weird conversations with an 88-year old, you know? Teri Rose wrote this loving remembrance of her son Ryland. You start with, Its like this.. Follow Kelly on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook. Its going to be great. Onwards, but you use it so beautifully when youre talking about Lizs family and how they are now. I found that instructive. I was in a big, big rush to get in front of him, and say my apology, and be returned to a state of grace, but the fact is that his mom died. Team Everything Happens, Kate, You dont have to bring it all. You wrote about the end of words. Find me online at @KateCBowler, and Id love to hear what you think of this episode. Kate Bowler:Yeah, yeah, yeah. Kate Bowler:So, todays conversation is about developing language to move us forward when life is well, chronic. Tell Me More with Kelly Corrigan is a series that inspires, educates and entertains. You know, like it wasnt me. Perhaps weve got to choose which we want to continue and which we want to challenge. I was wrong not to try to ease her days in some way.. They thrill, and confound, and circle, and overflow, and disappear, because its like this, having a life.. Download. Jewel and Kelly Corrigan have a conversation in NYC. Kelly Corrigan:And then she died, and my dad called, and my dad had nothing but positive things to say to me my entire life, and he said, You should have gone to see your grandmother more. I mean, maybe I was projecting, maybe whatever he said in that moment, maybe if he had said peanut butter, and jelly, wed be talking about peanut butter and jelly, but it totally resonated for me in the way that a song lyric does where youre like, I dont know what that means exactly, but Im going to write that down, and put it in my wallet, and its interesting. I was in a big, big rush to get in front of him, and say my apology, and be returned to a state of grace, but the fact is that his mom died. Kate Bowler:You are someone who has gotten mixed up in all kinds of things, and I am so glad to know you. I love you both so much and was tickled to hear you together. She died this morning, and I was just sick to my stomach. Kelly Corrigan:So, I used to go in there and write, and they have a meditation teacher twice a day at 10:00 AM and 3:00 PM, and at first I was sort of sheepish about availing myself of every single employee benefit, but sure enough, eventually I found myself sitting in there, and this guy was kind of amazing. He was saddled with depression and anxiety, which led to his trying to make himself feel better and reduce the noise in his head. This beautiful eulogy helps to paint the full picture of Ryland: a unique combination of funny, stubborn, difficult and smart. That sounds really right to me. I mean, that was my big experience of your book. I should not be mad about this. I absolutely love that phrase. When I read that, I just kept thinking of how scared Ive been about what I call being a zombie. They reel and wander and fixate and roll back and reconsider, because its like this, having a mind. Kelly Corrigan:So, I say at the end of this chapter, Shouldnt loss change a person for the better? You understand what you did wrong., Kelly Corrigan:So to me, that felt very different than saying, Im sorry. Thanks For Being Here Remembering Ryland. Her teams look to her for direction, but she wanted to see what would happen if she paused more to ask them questions, and found it totally changed her approach to both her work and family life. I went into this tiny bathroom in Baltimore in our office building, and just cried my eyes out, and it wasnt even because she died. Is this how you would have cared for my son?, and you end up fixating on all of these tiny little things, and at the same time, so overwhelmed by not being sure if its trivial or tragic. You cant only experience deep gratitude at the toenails that you seriously wish someone else would have cut, because seriously, whos doing this around here? So, Dont eat a hamster is our version of Dont jump to conclusions.. The Honor and Weight of of Being a Role Model. Kate Bowler:You and I are super chatty people, but you make an amazing pitch for silence, and I am all for it, because everyone always had these go-to things to say with me like, You can do it, or Youre so brave, and all the things that made me feel like I was on the other side of plexiglass. I rebelled. Our family motto is, We dont sell family. When our dog was a puppy and being housebroken, he kept sneaking around piddling in the corners of rooms. They swell, and constrict, and break, and forgive, and behold, because its like this, having a heart. Kelly mentions the Potted Plant Theory of Parenting. Its remarkable to hear a bit of your story and Im really grateful that youve shared it with us. Kate Bowler:Yeah. Thats where relationship lives is in these tiny moments, and whether you are cognizant of that and tuned into that channel all the time, or not, that is the story of a relationship. I was healthy, and then I was sick, and now Im feeling pretty good, and even though the language around immunotherapy isnt perfect, I can happily say that I am in remission. May you find Christ, comfort, and companions amidst the questions! Its a very learned thing that I have to insert the words into my mouth, and push them out deliberately, because my instinct is to solve. The book is full of warm and witty blessings found within the struggles of our shared humanity, from theNew York Timesbestselling authors ofGood Enough. Kate Bowler:Thanks so much for doing this. Kelly Corrigan:You know, that I had lost his favor for a moment, and I was just so ashamed. By creating an account, you acknowledge that PBS may share your information with our member stations and our respective service providers, and that you have read and understand the Privacy Policy and Terms of Use. Onwards, but you use it so beautifully when youre talking about Lizs family and how they are now. We read and appreciate every comment. Gratefully, Hes just one of those people that you think, God, if I could get five minutes with him, Id just tell him my biggest problem, and hed just say something in seven words that would solve everything., Kelly Corrigan:So, eventually I went up to him, and I said, Im caught between these two worlds, this world where Im full of clarity and insight and gratitude, and Im seeing all the big colors of the world. Like, Im just an ordinary person, and I make all the mistakes that everybody else makes and maybe even 10% more, and then there she was, and what she would have done for the life that I was kind of rushing through, multitasking my way through day, after day, and you know, sort of feeling snappish, and then catching myself, and feeling like I should be different. Like, Today could be this day, well, you know, today I met you, now were friends, and who knows whats going to happen now? I mean, people are getting colon cancer at your age all the time. You say something thats so weird cause I say it all the time, so when I read it I thought, Did you reach inside my brain? You adopted the phrase, Onward as a bit of a motto. Kelly, this is such a good reminder that sometimes we inherit tough histories and mottos. Today, were sharing this letter which Mary Hope wrote to officially introduce Alex because we find the kindness, transparency and unconditional love in it to be so inspiring. Kelly Corrigan:I know, me too. What a unique family motto! Like the other day when I was being wheeled into a procedure, the nurse looked at my chart, and then casually said, Colon cancer. I was also living only maybe 10 miles from my very old grandma who lived alone, and I kept kind of meaning to go visit her, but its a lot easier to show up at work every day at the United Way, and get kind of righteous about all the people who work for money versus the rest of us who are working for the greater good, than it is to go to your grandmas smelly, weird apartment, and have weird conversations with an 88-year old, you know? Id love to hear more about what this means to you. I think part of why your book is so moving is the way that these sayings crystallize these really big truths about who we are, and also how we should love each other. Labels like chronic illness, or caregiver, or widow, or mom of a kid with special needs. Its a sin, its hell. Maybe Wills curious phrase, Its like this, applies here too. Kelly Corrigan:Well, chop-chop kid. You dont have to bring it all. Kelly Corrigan:I mean, unless youre a monk, and youre meditating for 60 days in a mountain somewhere. Kate Bowler:Absolutely. Kelly Corrigan is a New York Times bestselling author whose first children's book, Hello World, is available now. Yeah. Shes not going to hold their babies.. I was so mad that I shook the cage a bit, that hamster eating its sibling. Kathy and her husband Tony have three children. And she said, Kelly, Im going to try to do the Uber to this wedding, and I was wondering if you can request a woman, and I said, No you cant, but you can trust it. Mahra:Ive been singing these lines from a song by the Avett Brothers to my kids for years, and it goes like this. Then I wanted to get right with him, and urgently. I didnt do it. Plus, we learn how the same technique can actually reduce racism and prejudice. It offers so much grace to us all who are struggling to do better and be better. Kelly Corrigan is the best-selling author of "Tell Me More: Stories about the 12 Hardest Things I'm Learning to Say," and a proud graduate of the University of Richmond. Onwards! Those ordinary consonants and vowels that, when strung together, offer meaning and points of entry for others. Kelly Corrigan:Its like a game changer. Read more about this episode, and get show notes, here. Im coming. Del Seymour and Kelly Corrigan in Lafayette, CA. I was wrong not to try to ease her days in some way.. After the potency of the crime metaphor wore off, I turned to the vocabulary of religion. Labels like chronic illness, or caregiver, or widow, or mom of a kid with special needs. Its the motto I live by when my opportunities are too big, and my capacity and capabilities too small. This is an amazing story. Kelly Corrigan:Im telling you what, man, you can not believe how much I use this, and you can not believe how still it is not my natural instinct. We had several hamsters in one cage, and they can be cannibalistic, and one morning a hamster was missing, and another hamster had a suspiciously large tummy.

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